Queer Kitchen Connection #15

Hey Taste Buds,

It’s been a challenging time since I last wrote to you, like an extra fast and scary rollercoaster that I didn’t agree to ride. Some of the things that seemed really good at first instead crashed and burned that much harder. It’s been hard to try out other rides (if we extend the metaphor), and even waiting in line for the food court or restrooms has felt impossible.

But it’s Pride Month now—we made it! I’ve been making noticeable progress growing my community on Twitch, my partner and I went to the Pride Parade (still masked, of course) for the first time since lockdown, and I added one of the zines I made to a time capsule that will be housed in the Dr. Madeline Davis LGBTQ Archive of WNY here in Buffalo.

How are you celebrating and resisting this Pride?

Wishing the best for us, always,

Jex

A photo of Jex, a white nonbinary person with short brown hair and wearing glasses and a black chef coat.

Send Foodz

Food pictures, stories, and connection from my kitchen (and yours)!

A 9x13 metal pan full of carrot cake topped with cream cheese icing and lots of chopped walnuts. A large rectangle of cake is missing from the lower right corner, and the head of a yellow spatula is prepared to serve more cake!

Every year around Earth Day, I start craving carrot cake. It’s become a big part of celebrating my authentic self (True Me Day is a day I celebrate on April 25th), the person that I have supported and loved into existence over the last 10-20 years. The craving snuck up on me this year, and I found myself adding shredded carrots, crushed pineapple, cream cheese, and chopped nuts to a list for my partner to pick up on their way home from work…and then we shared it with friends and neighbors that night! It was a delight. With everything going on in the world, I hope you are also finding moments of joy to keep you going like this did for me.

I’m not much of a baker, so when bananas are overripe I either support my partner in making banana bread or watch the bananas rot. This time, we had some leftover waffles and I decided to caramelize the bananas in butter and brown sugar. Serving them with plain Greek yogurt and waffles balanced the sweetness, and I’d definitely do this again!

A plate with 2 waffles, one in the foreground while the other is blurred, spread with a thick layer of plain Greek yogurt and topped with 3 long pieces of caramelized banana each. Also blurred at the back of the plate are 2.5 links of veg sausage.

A blue-rimmed bowl full of pad thai: many components are mixed together, including rice noodles, tofu, peanuts, and bell pepper, and topped with sliced scallions, bean sprouts and a pair of lime wedges.

I had some rice noodles hanging around in my cupboard, and I decided to make pad thai! My partner and I worked together to get the veggies and protein prepped, and then added ingredients to the wok in phases. Team work makes so many things better, and this pad thai is no exception!

Want to send foodz? Fill out this form with a photo and story, and we'll try to include it in the next Queer Kitchen Connection!

What’s Cooking?

Upcoming special events—Food Focused Nutrition-related or otherwise!

A Jeep constructed from graham crackers, waffle pretzels, and chocolate-covered donuts, decorated with Fruit Loops, color-blast Goldfish, and Skittles. A Pride flag constructed with rainbow candy and a toothpick sits beside the Jeep.

Pride Food-Play Adventure

Sunday, June 29
3-5pm EDT
on Google Meet

Register Now!

It’s that time again—Happy Pride!! I’ll be celebrating with some rainbow-colored food-play adventures, and I hope you’ll join me! Whether it’s a Pride float/vehicle made from a rainbow of fruits and veggies, or chips and dips, or graham crackers and colorful candies—there’s no wrong way to celebrate Pride on a food-play adventure. Registration’s open!

A photo of a small white and brown dog lying on a rainbow Pride flag, looking into the camera. A speech bubble includes text that reads, "Wanna PLAY?" Below is white text that reads: "Let's celebrate PRIDE with rainbow foods and community!"

Merch Drop!!!

It took a lot of extra, unnecessary time and effort because of my name change (YAY my name is legally my name now!!), but I now have a print-on-demand merch shop that functions as expected and has a few items I designed in it! I’ve got mugs and t-shirts which are primarily related to my Twitch content and audience, but all of which are things that I wanted to see exist in the world—and maybe you do too!

You can also read more about my side-quest into having a Twitch channel on my website: check it out!

The Intersection

I'm always working on making Food Focused Nutrition more accessible with baked-in, intentional inclusion. What's the latest step in my journey?

I was recently pursuing a potentially awesome opportunity for Food Focused Nutrition to grow…but I’m deeply disappointed (understatement); it is not happening because the potential partner did not want to take on an opportunity to grow in their inclusivity practices. I don’t want to waste more energy on them, but I do want to write about why inclusive practices must be prioritized if we want to create positive change in the world.

If we approach inclusion as a luxury or a nice benefit, it’s easy to say “not now” when someone asks for a supportive change. But when we say “not now” to inclusion, how many oppressive structures will be upheld in the meanwhile? How much more harm will be done before “not now” becomes “now”?

A doodle of a pile of blue, yellow, and gray ribbons with red text that reads, “Second chances are rare, cherish them. –Jex Calvert”

Drawn by Reb (@veggiedoodlesoup)

This drawing is from a speaker opportunity I had in 2020. I was talking about inclusion then too, and one of the big takeaways that I was aiming for was that this discomfort that occurs when someone says “Hey, this isn’t great. What you’re doing could be better/more inclusive/more accessible” is a second chance that should be cherished. It’s an icky feeling, but one I cultivate gratitude for because I know it would often be easier for that person to leave and never offer an opportunity to grow or become better. This resonated with someone in the audience enough for this drawing to exist (thanks, Reb!). My recent experiences reminded me of this illustrated quote, and how this has been a foundational part of how I approach inclusion since Food Focused Nutrition’s start.

What does it look like when inclusion is the priority? I haven’t experienced it much myself (though it’s how I aspire to be), but it’s like being in a space where everyone’s needs were already thought of and considered. Or if they weren’t, the response to repair the situation is prompt and effective. I would personally move mountains for anyone who told me how I could repair the harm I caused to them, and limit any future harm I do to others in the same way. I'm committed to progressive change like this because I know how difficult it can be to request a change in the first place—often it would be easier to leave or avoid the situation.

Inclusion isn’t about having a few things on a checklist that need to be completed. Inclusion is an ongoing way of being. I hope more providers that I attempt to ally with in the future will share this perspective—then we’ll definitely make the world a better place!

On a green background is a red starburst "bang" shape, as in a comic book, with lines and stars emitting from it. Within the shape is text that reads, "Support the Pay It Forward fund!"

All contributions to the Pay It Forward Fund support folx in accessing low- or no-cost services with Food Focused Nutrition. Learn more or share my post about the fund on Instagram or Facebook!

Suggest-ipe

Because the way I see it, all recipes are merely suggestions!

Caramelized Bananas –
or other fruit

Suggested Ingredients

Fruit (2 bananas, or another fruit of choice)
2 T butter
2 T brown sugar or another sweetener of choice
Cinnamon to taste (optional)
Vanilla to taste (optional)

Suggested Instructions

Peel and slice your fruit.
- Many recipes cut the bananas in coins, but I prefer to keep the banana “slices” as large as possible so that I have less flipping to do (they get really fragile while cooking).
- Because I don’t like getting my hands covered in banana, I cut them in a very specific way that I will valiantly try to describe: As I peel one strip down the outer curve of the banana, I use a butter knife to slice down the middle along the entire length, with the tip of the knife against the peel I haven’t removed. About halfway down, I cut a horizontal slice to remove the top two quarters of the banana (they’d probably break at this point otherwise), and then continue slicing the banana down the middle until I get to the base of the peel.
- If it’s easier for you to peel the bananas fully before cutting, place the peeled bananas on your cutting board so it looks like a smile or a frown (the ends of the banana are to your right and left). Cut in half right down the center of the smile or frown. Then cut down the length of each half to make quarters.
- One could also slice apples or pears or pineapple (or another fruit you like), maybe ¼” thick, and use a similar recipe to caramelize them. These fruits are harder than bananas, so the cooking time may be a little longer, but they would also be less fragile in the pan.
Heat a non-stick or stainless steel skillet over medium-low heat. Melt 2 T butter.
When the butter is melted, add the sliced fruit in a single layer, cut-side down.
Sprinkle 2 T of brown sugar (or any sweetener of your choice) over top of the fruit. Add a sprinkle of cinnamon too if you like.
Let the fruit cook without movement (no stirring) for 3-4 min, until nicely browned. Flip, and cook for another 3-4 min without movement to allow for browning.
Turn off the heat and, if desired, add a bit of vanilla over top and shake the pan to vaguely incorporate it with the rest of the buttery, sugary sauce.
As it cools, the sauce will harden (especially if served with something cold like ice cream), so enjoy promptly!

That’s all for now!

Queer Kitchen Connection is an every-other-month newsletter from Food Focused Nutrition.

I want this newsletter to be an invitation for us all to foster more connection around food.

My dream is that Queer Kitchen Connection will be the start of a conversation, and I welcome you to taste, savor, and share in the creation of community with direct replies to the newsletter.

Author Jex Calvert, RDN, Food Focused Nutrition
“Edible-in-Chef” Ashley Bovin, Ease Up Consulting

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